Chapter 17-I Gave You my Love in Vain

My body never knew such pleasure, my heart never knew such pain
…and you left me so confused now I’m cried out over you

It’s amazing how your life can change in a year and a half. Pat and I were in the perfect relationship and then he went and did something stupid. I stayed by his side after he was arrested with James for assaulting a taxi driver for twenty cents but shortly after he was arrested, pictures surfaced all around Chicago of him, Kris, and John in a limo with women all over them. Pat was shirtless and had a blonde on his right and a brunette on his left. Kris also had women all over him as well as John.

John was married and had children, Kris was single, and well Pat had me. I remember getting the phone call that Pat was arrested. I have never been so scared in my life. I was so pissed at James for letting Pat get into trouble, he promised me he wouldn’t let Pat do anything stupid and he did. He was supposed to be the older and more mature model, the one Pat could model himself after but they both were stupid.

I pressed the talk button on my Blackberry when I noticed a number that didn’t look familiar.

“Hello.”

“Is this Ally Jordan,” a man’s voice asked on the other end.

“This is she, who’s calling.”

“This is Sergeant Baranski with the Buffalo Police Department.”

My heart sank, not something you want to here when your fiancé is out partying with his cousin.

“Oh my God,” I gasped, “Is Patrick okay?”

“He’s fine, however, he was picked up earlier this evening and charged with assault and battery,” he replied.

“WHAT,” I shouted, “I’m sorry I didn’t mean to shout at you but that’s not like my Pat at all.”

“He and his cousin were in a taxi on their way to another bar in the city and they assaulted the driver for twenty cents.”

I felt the tears fall out of my eyes when Donna walked into the room, “Honey, what’s wrong?”

“Here,” I said handing her the phone.

“Who is it,” she asked taking the phone.

“Buffalo Police,” I barely managed to get out and she took the phone out of my hand.

“Hello this is Donna Kane, I’m Pat’s mom, where’s my baby, is he okay?”

“Mrs. Kane, your son and nephew were arrested earlier this evening for assaulting a taxi driver,” I heard the cop say.

“WHAT? MY PATRICK? ARE YOU SERIOUS?? What jail? How much is the bail? Okay, we’ll be right there.”

“What jail,” I asked grabbing my purse and Pat’s checkbook out of his drawer.

“Erie County,” Donna replied, “Get dressed, I’ll wake up Pat and Robert then we’ll go.”

“Okay,” I replied as she handed me my phone and I threw it in my purse while grabbing Pat’s Hawks hoodie out of the closet and throwing it over my head.

I walked out of the room and shut the light off before I got into the car where Donna, Robert, and Pat were waiting.

We drove to the jail and I walked in seeing Pat and James sitting in the holding cell. Pat looked up at me and my heart ached at how sad he looked. Sure he was drunk but he knew what he did and he knew that he embarrassed himself, me, his family, and the Blackhawks organization.

“Ally,” he said coming to the bars and I walked over to him, “Baby, I am so sorry. I was drunk, it was stupid, I’m sorry.”

“I know Pat, I know,” I said giving him a kiss.

“No touching,” the tall bald and scrawny police officer scolded.

“Yes sir,’ I replied pulling away before looking at Pat, “We’re going to get you out of here.”

“How much is the bail,” I asked.

“Twelve hundred for both,” the officer replied and I sat down at the desk pulling Pat’s check book out of my purse and writing a check for him while Robert wrote a check for James.

“We’ll talk about this in the morning,” Donna said as we walked up the steps to our room, “Ally make sure he doesn’t fall or do anything else stupid.”

“Yes ma’am,” I replied wrapping Pat’s arm around my shoulder walking him upstairs.

He soon passed out after his head hit the pillow and I stripped him down to his boxers and crawled in bed next to him pulling the covers over us.

The sound of Pat puking his guts out in the toilet the next morning woke me up from my sleep and I walked into the bathroom and sat next to him pressing the cold rag to his forehead and neck.

“Are you okay,” I asked.

“I feel like I got hit by a Mack truck,” he replied, “What happened last night?”

“You don’t remember anything, do you,” I asked him and he shook his head no and I sighed.

“What happened,” he asked, “Ally, did I cheat on you?”

“If you cheated on me, do you honestly think I’d be sitting here right now?”

“I guess you’re right but what happened,” he asked again, “Please tell me!”

“You and James were arrested.”

“We were what,” he asked, “Ally, that’s funny but seriously what happened?”

“I wish I was joking Patrick,” I replied, “You and him assaulted a taxi driver over twenty cents.”

“You’ve got to be fucking kidding me,” he said leaning against the tub putting his elbows on his knees and rubbing his temples, “Do you have any idea how this is going to look on me and the Hawks?”

“Pat, you have got to apologize,” I said, “Get on the phone, call your agent, set up a press conference.”

“What was I charged with,” he asked.

“Second-degree robbery, fourth-degree criminal mischief, and theft of services.”

“WHAT,” he said slamming his fist off the side of the tub and I jumped going over to him and he wrapped his arms around me clinging to me as if his life depended on it.

“We’re going to get through this,” I replied, “You’re hearing is on Monday in front of the DA. You’re lawyer is on his way here from Chicago.”

“Ally, what the fuck did I do,” he said between tears and I rubbed his neck up and down as he still clung to me.

“You made a mistake,” I replied, “You did something very stupid and we’ll get through it together. I’m sticking by your side here, so are your mom, dad, and sisters.”

“I don’t deserve you,” he sobbed, “Any other girl would have ran for the hills yet here you are comforting me telling me everything is going to be okay.”

“Because it will Pat,” I said cupping his jaw so he was looking me in my eyes, “Look at me, we’ll get through this.”

“I love you,” he said giving me a kiss.

“I love you too,” I replied as I put my head on his shoulder and we sat like that for God knows how long before Donna and Pat came in to talk to Patrick.

I sat at my grandmother’s dining room table opening up the mail that I had let grow for the past three months. There were letters from Pat that I never read and didn’t care to read. After the pictures came out with him and the girls I left. I couldn’t trust him anymore, of course he got arrested for robbery but I stayed with him through that but after the thought of him touching another woman the same way he touched me made me sick. I remember Erica was the one who discovered the pictures.

She loved going onto the girlfriend forums on a bogus blog site to read what they were saying about her and I dating the stars of the Hawks but nothing could have prepared me seeing Patrick all over another woman.

“Holy shit Ally,” she said looking at her laptop at the dining room table while I worked on a research paper for my business class.

“What,” I asked.

“Promise me you won’t freak out,” she replied.

“I promise,” I said trusting my best friend of fourteen years.

“My brother is going to have to go through hell and high water once I am done with him,” she replied turning the computer around so I could see it and I gasped in shock.

“THAT BASTARD,” I screamed standing up from the table, “I’M GOING TO KILL HIM!!”

“Ally, calm down,” she said, “I’m sure it’s just a big misunderstanding and that they’re photoshopped or something.”

“Photoshopped my ass Kris and John are in the pictures below the one of Pat,” I replied hitting the print button on the laptop and grabbing them from the printer in the living room before I stomped up the steps to the shower where Pat was.

I angrily ripped open the shower curtain startling Pat as I slapped him across his face.

“ALLY, WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT FOR,” he shouted rubbing his cheek.

“FOR THESE YOU BASTARD,” I said shoving the pictures in his wet hands and it caused the ink to run, “DID YOU THINK I WOULD NOT FIND OUT?”

“Ally,” he began, “Let me explain, it’s not what it looks like?”

“Oh really, so two whores all over my fiancé isn’t what it looks like. I don’t believe that for the second,” I cried.

“Please baby,” he said turning the water off and wrapping the towel around his waist, “I swear to you that I would never hurt you again.”

“Yeah well it looks like you didn’t fulfill that promise,” I said taking the ring off my left hand and holding it between my thumb and index finger in his face, “DID YOU PROPOSE TO ME OUT OF GUILT?”

It was obvious the pictures weren’t fresh and that they were from around his rookie or sophomore year. I was leaning towards rookie year because his hair was longer and he looked really young considering he looked a lot older now and had short hair from his haircut back in February.

“God no Ally,” he said going to hug me and I pushed him away.

“I’m done,” I said not letting the tears escape my eyes, “We’re done.”

“What,” he asked, “No no no no, Ally please?”

“Don’t Ally please me,” I said, “You’re a lying bastard and I want nothing to do with you, we’re done.”

“You can’t just leave, you don’t have anywhere to go,” he said.

“Yeah I do,” I said throwing the ring at him, “Here’s your fucking guilt back.”

I slammed the bathroom door behind me and walked into the room that I have called mine since I was fourteen years old. I somehow managed to fit all of my clothes into the suitcase and all of my jewelry and hair stuff into the carryon. I grabbed my purse, cell phone, and passport and headed out of the door after saying goodbye to Donna and Erica.

I couldn’t help but wipe away the tear that fell from my eye as I opened the rather large envelope from Leah and Adam’s address in Chicago.

Dear Ally,

We miss you and we hope that you are doing well. Enclosed is an invitation to a wedding and card for my bridal party number at David’s Bridal. The wedding is January 30th in Wisconsin since Adam is from there and his grandma is elderly and we didn’t want her travelling. I left you the bridal registry number because I want you to be in the wedding. I know the last thing you want to do is see Pat but Ally you have to face him sometime. I really hope you come, Ally, it would mean the world to Adam and I.

Love, Leah

I sighed as I looked at the invitation, I was going to the wedding. I didn’t have to say a word to Pat. I didn’t owe him an explanation, he knows what he did to me.

I opened my laptop and booked the first flight to Madison, Wisconsin. I went upstairs packed my suitcase and left the house after I said goodbye to my grandparents. I didn’t go stay with my parents because my dad would have said, “I told you he’d cheat,” and I wasn’t in the mood for him.

It was now the twenty-sixth of January and I had to be there and hope I can get a dress without any alterations in four days. I boarded the plane putting my iPod in my ears and closing my eyes drifting off to sleep.

I woke up when the flight attendant told me that we were landing and to fasten my seatbelt. I got off the plane and hailed a taxi to the airport. I did have to laugh when I got in thinking of what Pat did but that was just it, I couldn’t think of him. I spent the last five months trying to forget him but I just couldn’t. I loved him but he cheated on me…I think. That’s just it, I didn’t go to neither Kris nor John. I left thinking he cheated without waiting for an explanation. My mind told me he cheated but my heart told me he didn’t. I changed my number and my email address so he couldn’t contact me. Donna had my new number but she promised me she wouldn’t give it to him or Erica.

I was angry at myself for shutting Erica out, she was there for me so much over the years and I stopped talking to her for no reason at all.

I sighed as I pulled up in front of the Holiday Inn in Madison and checked in. When I got to my room I dialed Leah’s number asking her if she’d meet me at the bridal shop so that I could try on a dress. She was beyond thrilled that I was coming to the wedding and couldn’t wait to tell Adam.

“ALLY,” she screamed as I got off the elevator and saw her standing in the lobby with Nikki, Adam’s sister.

“Hi Leah,” I said hugging her, “How have you been? Oh wow you changed your hair color.”

“I’ve been great and yeah it’s red,” she said, “How about you?”

“Just trying to get over what happened,” I replied, “I miss him.”

“I know you do,” she said, “Have you ever met Adam’s sister, Nikki?”

“No I haven’t,” I said, “I’m Ally, I used to date Kane.”

“I’ve heard a lot of great things about you from my brother,” she said shaking my hand.

“We better get going,” Leah said and we headed out to the car.

“David’s Bridal,” I asked suspiciously, “Leah, I thought you’d get designer dresses for free from Dolce and Gabbana?”

“I did,” she replied as Nikki pulled up in front of a house, “They’re here at Adam’s family’s house.”

I got out of the car and followed Leah and Nikki to the front door of the house, “ADAM WE’RE BACK,” Leah shouted.

“Ally,” he said running down the steps, “God, we’ve missed you.”

“I’ve missed you guys too, Adam,” I replied giving him a hug and a kiss on the cheek, “How’s the season going so far"(I think we all know how this season ended up).

“We’re favored to win the cup,” he replied smiling, “We have the Olympic break next month then we mean business after that.”

“Have you thought about going to Vancouver,” Leah asked, “You know Pat was chosen for team USA.”

“Wow, I did not know that,” I said feeling like a total ass, “That’s great.”

“Are you going to go,” Adam asked.

“I don’t know,” I replied, “I don’t think I can be there for that.”

“Let’s try on the dresses,” Nikki said quickly changing the subject seeing that I was uncomfortable right now answering questions about Pat.

“Thanks,” I mouthed to her and she nodded her head.

A few days later we were all at the Church downstairs getting ready. Donna immediately wrapped her arms around me and to my surprise Erica did too as well as Jackie and Jessica.

“It’s great to see you again,” Donna replied, “Ally we miss you terribly.”

“I miss you guys too,” I replied, “I have thought about coming back to visit.

“Please come back with us after the wedding,” Erica said, “Pat’s going back to Chicago before he leaves for Vancouver.”

“I’ll think about it,” I said as the make-up artist finished my hair and make-up.

“You finally went back to being blonde,” Erica replied, “I missed your hair matching mine.”

“I miss you cooking me breakfast every morning,” Jackie said.

“I miss cooking for you too,” I said kissing her forehead, “I’ll be back though one day, I promise.”

“Guys, they’re ready for us,” Alyssa said walking into the room with her and Brent’s 2 year old son Jordan on her hip. He looked just like Brent, the mouth, nose, eyes, and yes even the hair. He was too cute. Definitely going to be a heartbreaker when he gets older.

Jordan took off running up the steps with Alyssa shouting after him but he didn’t listen because when he got to the top of the steps Brent was standing there with Jon and Duncan.

“Of course wherever Brent is, Duncan is too,” Alyssa said, “If I didn’t know any better, I’d think my husband was cheating on me with him.”

“Shut up,” Brent said joking giving her a kiss, “Ally, wow welcome back.”

“Thanks Brent,” I said as Jordan reached out to me and I scooped him up in my arms. I missed seeing his smiling face at all of the games and in the locker room after the game.

Pat walked up the steps on the opposite side of the Church fumbling with his tie, “Can someone please help me tie this damn thing,” he asked and Jon walked over helping him tie it.

I sat Jordan down and turned my back towards him so he didn’t recognize me. The next thing I knew, Jordan ran over holding a dozen roses in his little hands with a card.

“Aunt Ally,” he said, “Deeze for you.”

“Thanks sweetie,” I said bending down so that I was at his level, “Who are they from?”

“Uncle Pat,” he replied.

I wanted to cry looking at the roses, he remembered that I loved peach colored roses. I handed them to Erica as I ripped open the card and it was a card with a rainbow on the front with I miss you written on the inside. He didn’t sign it at all. I grabbed the flowers from Erica and handed them back to Jordan.

“You can go tell your Uncle Pat that he can shove these right up his,” I started to say when Alyssa cut me off.

“ALLY,” she scolded and I couldn’t help but laugh.

“Sorry,” I said.

“Uncle Pat,” Jordan shouted running over to him with the roses in his hand and Pat’s face fell.

“You were supposed to give them to her bud,” he said to the toddler.

“Aunt Ally say you can shove these right up your ass,” Jordan said as plain as day and all of the guys started laughing and Brent picked his son up telling him that it was a bad thing to say and to never let him hear him curse again.

“Alright line-up everyone,” the wedding planner announced, “We’re ready to begin.”

Everyone lined up, Alyssa was paired up with Brent. Nikki was paired up with Sharpie. Jon was paired up with Erica, Duncan was paired up with Jessica, Jackie was paired up with Kris and you guessed it, I was paired up with Pat while James was paired up with Donna.

“You look beautiful,” Pat whispered as we walked down the aisle.

“Don’t start,” I whispered through my smile.

“This could have been us,” he whispered again.

“Say one more word and I will castrate you in front of Jesus,” I said as we both went off to our separate ends at the altar.

The ceremony was beautiful, Leah deserved Adam after everything she went through with Jason. Who would have thought that Adam would settle down but everyone changes and he definitely changed for the better.

The reception was held inside a ski resort and the view of the snow on the ground outside was gorgeous. Adam and Leah danced to “You Had Me From Hello” the Kenny Chesney song that was featured in the movie Jerry McGuire. Leave it up to Adam to pick the wedding song and you get a cheesy yet romantic country song. The bridal party was invited to dance with them and I was quickly asked to dance by Sharpie which I accepted while Nikki danced with Pat.

I watched Pat sigh in defeat as he started dancing with Nikki, “He really wanted to dance with you,” Sharpie said as we danced around the dance floor, “He misses you.”

“He hurt me Sharpie,” I sighed, “I can’t forgive him that easily.”

“At least talk to him,” Sharpie said and I knew he was right.

“I guess I do owe him that much,” I replied, “How have you been?”

“I’ve been okay,” he said smiling before he started joking around about me being single, “Nice hair by the way, you know I love blondes and since your single, let’s go to dinner.”

“It’s still in your dreams buddy,” I replied laughing.

“Aw darn,” he said smiling, “Song’s over, let’s eat.”

At dinner I sat next to Pat with Jon and Erica on my right. I saw Pat tense up a few times out of the corner of my eye when Jon would lean over and whisper things into Erica’s ear before he kissed her.

“Jesus Christ, do you have to do that in front of me,” he snapped at them and Jon apologized and Erica looked at me.

I felt bad because right then in there I knew he missed me and that I really and truly missed him. I sat at the table not knowing what to do when Pat walked out to the bar.

“What a terrible song to play at a wedding,” I thought to myself as the DJ played “Just A Dream” by Carrie Underwood.

Baby why’d you leave me, why’d you have to go
I was counting on forever, now I’ll never know
I can’t even breathe, it’s like I’m looking from a distance
Staring at a background, everybody’s saying, “He’s not coming home now”
This can’t be happening to me, this is just a dream

Even though the song was about a soldier dying before his wedding day, the chorus fit my relationship with Pat so well. I sat silently in my chair when I heard Jon whisper to Erica that there was a coatroom with a lock down the hall and I had to laugh.

Jon was getting pretty bold with Erica, I guess that’s what happens when you’re together for two years. In fact, I know that’s what happens when you’re together for two years. Pat and I were together for two years before everything happened. I looked across the hall and met Pat’s eyes and I couldn’t help but stare as Carrie sang the chorus again. This wasn’t a dream though for us, this was reality and in reality we had to work out our problems.

The DJ switched to “Carry Out” by Timbaland and Justin Timberlake.

“You and me,” Sharpie said looking from me to the empty dance floor, “Let’s show them how to get down.”

“I’d love to,” I said setting my drink down and taking his hand as we both started dancing on the dance floor.

“You want to make him jealous,” Sharpie asked.

“You know it,” I replied laughing and turning around grinding on Sharpie and he put his hands on my hips and we danced to the song. Pat looked furious and I smirked to myself as everyone hooted and hollered at both Sharpie and I. Donna laughed until she had tears in her eyes because she knew what I was doing. She was mad at Pat just like I was but he was her son and she had to go a little easy on him.

“Leah, I’m going to head out,” I whispered to her as the song ended, “I have to fly back tomorrow.”

“Thank you so much for coming,” she said hugging me, “It meant a lot to both me and Adam.”

“I know it did,” I said smiling, “I’m glad I came, it was good seeing everyone again.”

“Are you leaving,” Adam asked coming over to me.

“Yeah I have to fly back early tomorrow morning,” I said smiling and giving him a hug, “Congratulations Bur, this was a beautiful wedding.”

“Thank you,” he replied, “Thank you for bringing Leah into my life too.”

“You’re welcome,” I said hugging him, “I’ll see you guys in Vancouver.”

“You’re coming,” he asked.

“It’s a big thing for Pat and the boys, I wouldn’t miss it for the world.”

I was putting my coat on while talking to the Kane family when the DJ began playing “Back at One” by Brian McKnight. The song I first danced to with Pat, the song he proposed to, the song we made love to our first time, all of the memories came flooding back to me but I couldn’t bring myself to look at him. I hugged Donna, the girls, Pat Sr., Robert, James, and Karen goodbye. I thought I had made my getaway when Pat grabbed my hand causing me to stop in the doorway and I felt the electricity go through my veins.

“Dance with me,” he whispered, “I know you’re mad at me but please this is our song, just one dance.”

I looked up into his big blue eyes that were pleading with me to dance with him and I let my hand fall from his.

“I can’t,” I whispered, “I’m sorry.”

He shut his eyes before he nodded his head and I walked away wiping the tears from my eyes as I headed out the door into the cold Wisconsin air to my room across the resort that I’d stay in before flying back tomorrow.

Instead of going back to Florida, I went back to Buffalo. I don’t know why I went back to Buffalo but something told me to go back. I knew when I was going to talk to Pat and that was going to be in Vancouver after his gold medal game. I knew the US would make it pretty far in the games and I just hoped the gold medal is what they were going to go for.

Adam and Leah went to the Bahamas for their honeymoon, I’m pretty sure Adam faked an injury to get time off. In fact, knowing Adam, I was sure of it.

Leah called me in hysterics saying Jason called her and threatened to come after her and the entire Kane family. He didn’t know she was married to Adam at first but it’s been two years since we heard from Jason and we thought he was out of our lives forever but after he found out he threatened to hurt us. I was standing in the Kane’s kitchen one night getting ready to catch my flight to head back to Florida when I heard someone behind me, thinking it was Pat I turned around ready to argue with him but when I saw it was Jason I screamed and he ran towards me.

I grabbed the gun out of the tool drawer in the kitchen that Donna had bought shortly after Jason threatened us the first time when Leah left for Sweden.

“Step any closer and I won’t hesitate to kill you, you bastard,” I said pulling the safety back on the gun ready to fire if I needed to.

“You think you and your family saw the last of me when that bastard that’s married to my Leah beat me unconscious. I’ll kill your whole fucking family if I have to,” Jason said as he began taking another step forward and I screamed for help hoping Pat or Donna would wake up.

“I swear to God I will fucking blow your head off,” I said as he took a step forward and I saw Pat run in behind him hitting him over the head with a bat.

“Call the police,” he said taking the gun from me, holding it on the now unconscious Jason who lay on the kitchen floor in a pool of blood.

“911 what’s your emergency,” the dispatch lady asked.

“We have an intruder at 1988 Collier Drive,” I began, “Please hurry, he threatened to kill the entire family.”

“Is he still in the house,” she asked.

“No my best friend’s brother hit him over the head with a bat and he is unconscious,” I said crying as my hands were struggling to stay calm.

“Help is on the way,” she said hanging up the phone. I set the phone down on the counter and started crying when Donna and Pat Sr. came into the kitchen and took the gun from Pat. Donna sat Jason in a chair and duct taped him to it.

“Shhhhh,” Pat said wrapping his arms around me and I let him, “It’s okay!”

“He threatened to kill us,” I sobbed wrapping my arms around his back.

“I wasn’t going to let him hurt you,” Pat said kissing the top of my head, “Calm down, please?”

I sat down on the couch in the living room with Pat Sr.

“Are you okay,” he asked.

“I’m fine,” I said smiling.

“Did he hurt you?”

“I grabbed the gun out of the drawer before he could get any closer.”

“What did he say to you?”

“He threatened to kill us all and said we thought we got rid of him when Adam beat him unconscious but we’re all going to pay because Adam married ‘his’ Leah.”

“He’s a fucking psycho,” Pat Sr. said as the cops came in through the front door.

“Where’s the suspect,” the officer asked.

“He’s in the kitchen duct taped to a chair thanks to my wife,” Pat Sr. said smiling and the cop couldn’t help but laugh.

“Ally,” Pat said sitting next to me when Pat went into the kitchen with Donna, “I know you don’t want to talk to me and I understand that but in the kitchen when you were talking to the woman from 911 you called me your best friend’s brother. I don’t want to be that anymore, I thought I stopped being that a long time ago but anyways I just wanted to let you know that I made Team USA for the Olympics and Jon made Team Canada. The games start February 16 and we would love it if you showed up to support us. I don’t even care if you don’t come for all the games but please just come to one. It’d mean a lot to both of us.”

“I’ll think about it,” I said as the officer walked in to get our statements.

“We’ll be in touch,” the officer replied walking out of the house.

I grabbed my luggage and following the cops out of the house. As I got into my rental car, I looked at the living room window and saw Pat standing there looking at me. If this were a romance movie, he’d be out here chasing my car down the street until I stopped, got out and kissed him but this wasn’t a romance movie, this was my life and I had to make my own happy ending, just not tonight.
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* A/N: I hope you guys are enjoying the story just as much as I am enjoying writing it. Hawks are the 2010 Stanley Cup Champs WOOHOO!! FINALLY Hossa gets the big one.

Just wanted to note that any dialogue in Italics that isn’t bold are Ally’s flashbacks. I have the next three chapters planned out in my head and this story will be updated very soon within the next couple of weeks. Please review and I hope you enjoyed the shocking twist of Chapter 17.
xo~DeAnna~xo